In the last post, I shared with you 5 COMPLETELY FREE Acts of Self-Care. I hope you noticed that the theme was making connections, between yourself and your breath, your body, your mind, and your friends.
Self-Care as a form of Escapism
But for so many people, there is a belief that self-care is a form of escapism. That is, they feel that in order to recharge they need to withdraw from others.
Let me be clear: if your personality is more introverted, you likely do need time to yourself to feel your best. If you like to take long walks in nature to reconnect with yourself so that you can be your best self, that’s fantastic.
But what I want to talk about today is the misconception that other forms of escapism are self-care. Notably, that need that so many people have to zone out, using food or alcohol or digital media as a pacification method.
Self-care is about nourishing yourself and building yourself up. If you find yourself caught up in endless internet surfing, mindlessly watching cat videos night after night, ask yourself: Is this really the best way to feed my soul?
By escaping into something that doesn’t really nourish you, are you just escaping from something else? Perhaps it’s a bad boss. Or maybe you’re tired of the polarized political climate. Then again, maybe you’re simply bored by the reality of your life.
This desire to zone out may be necessary from time to time. Life can be overwhelming. The number of people competing for our attention and time often makes women want to run for the hills. Mindless consumption– whether it is caloric or media– as a one-off event won’t really hurt you. But if it becomes a pattern, a way of soothing yourself, then you’ve moved on from protective self-care to an unhealthy behavior.
Look, I’m no angel. One time several years ago, in the middle of the night awake with an unsettled baby, I googled, “Silent Retreat Center near me.” The thought of running away for a weekend and talking to NO ONE seemed positively dreamy. (Let’s be honest– it still does.) And while this escapist strategy would have been lovely, what I really needed to do was reassess why I felt the need to run away in the first place.
What’s so bad about self-care as a form of escapism?
Let’s use an example a lot of us can relate to. (Myself included!)
A lot of people use TV or the internet as an evening wind down. But as we learn more and more about the detrimental effects of blue light (as emitted by digital devices) on sleep, we need to be mindful of how our evening escapism is affecting our overall wellness.
Blue light interrupts our body’s natural circadian rhythm. It tells our body to WAKE UP right at the time we need to be winding down for the day. As such, many people have difficulty falling asleep. Others fall asleep in front of the TV, but then wake up because they’re not in the best environment for sleep. Either way, this zoning out is not a productive form of self-care. Rather, it is escapism that has knock-on detrimental effects on your health.
Can Self-Care as a form of escapism ever be positive?
My regular running workouts give me a tiny escape a few days a week. No headphones; nothing but my footfalls. Running is a productive form of escapist self-care, as I get to be outside and work my body at the same time. But I still recognize that, at it’s root, my long runs are self-care as a form of escapism.
If you’re addicted to your weekly Zumba class, rock on! For those of you who love to spend all day in the kitchen making a delicious meal for family and friends, keep on cooking! There are, indeed, lots of ways self-care as a form of escapism can be positive.
As with any type of healthy habit building, a thoughtful reflection about your behaviors can help you craft the wellness lifestyle you seek. Finding the balance between escapism and connection can outline the best self-care practices for you to adopt. The good news is that making time for self-care doesn’t need to take over your calendar. True self-care can be threaded in to your life to nourish you daily.
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